Let’s travel back to the summer of 2018, shall we? A time where there were no face masks, a time when we could hug our loved ones, and a time when I was going on college tours.

An ambitious rising high school senior, I had big goals of what to do with my college experience. I wanted a big school with lots of students and diversity, a place where my professors were invested in me and my education, a school full of spirit and enthusiasm, and a place where I could find a tight-knit group of friends to last a lifetime. I guess no one told me these expectations were straight from a late-2000s rom-com, somewhere along the lines of Legally Blonde.

My parents were, as you can imagine, a bit overwhelmed by my long list of requirements. But they supported me the entire way and took me on a road trip across the country to tour schools.

We started out at the top of California, to visit Stanford and Berkley. Yeah, I’m that kind of nerd. I only had a few anxiety attacks on the drive there – I think I had one in Salt Lake City and one at the hotel in Berkley. I hadn’t realized the weight of the decision I was trying to make until we were already on the way. I was ultimately deciding where my family and I were going to move and live for the next 4+ years.

Being physically disabled creates a lot of barriers and boundaries to cross in life, and this was going to be the biggest yet. My mom told me she was going to support and help me the whole way through, after all, my definition of independence was (and is) different than my peers. While most rising seniors are stressing about parties or moving far away from home, I was stressing about insurance for my caregivers and what that would be like in a different state. So, my mom promised me that wherever I decided to go, they would move within a 20-minute drive away so she could be my backup plan.

Sure, that sounded nice and comforting… but also felt like the weight of the world was resting on my shoulders. They told me not to worry, but how was I supposed to enjoy my tours when in the back of my mind my family’s stability was lingering?

I still enjoyed the adventures, though. I traveled through the hilly area of Berkley, felt the baking summer heat in Stanford, pictured myself studying dutifully in each library and café, and then we worked our way south towards UCLA and Whittier College. But we couldn’t travel through Anaheim, California without two necessary pit-stops – Disneyland and Universal Studios!

Okay, so it wasn’t really a “pit-stop,” per say, since we spent about 4 days running amok. It was a much-needed break, though! I felt very nostalgic as I took pictures with characters like Peter Pan and the Mad Hatter while internally freaking out about growing up. There’s nothing like the magic of Disney and Harry Potter to remind you who you are.

I left that part of the trip and progressed to visit UCLA and Whittier, finally feeling like my old childish self again. I didn’t stress about what library spot I would have, or what gifts I should get from their bookstores. I simply looked at the campuses, the cities around them, and tried to imagine myself living there (regardless of where my parents lived). I was able to picture myself enjoying my time at each place, and was getting excited about the adventures waiting for me.

On the drive back, we stopped at Las Vegas, Nevada. I spent one afternoon sitting and filling out postcards to send my friends while my parents rested. I quickly explained to each friend a different memory from each place, secretly trying to convince them to apply to the same schools I was. As I read over each and corrected some pen smudge-marks, I realized that I felt content with each campus I visited. Although I ruled out Berkley and Whittier pretty fast, I still saw the beauty in them.

 

Maybe the college experience didn’t need to fit inside a 97-minute rom com starring Reece Witherspoon, maybe it just needed to be nice for me. And that’s what I found just up the highway from my high school, the beautiful campus of the University of Denver!